procrastination.

procrastination sucks. i have so much to get done and so little time to do it. i'm going to chapel hill later so i can see my friend meredith. i haven't seen her since thanksgiving break, which is a really long time ago. it will be nice to get away from raleigh for a little while. i'm getting more and more jaded everyday. i'm taking this week to clear my head, make some decisions and dive head first in school. i've been holding back a lot lately, i don't like feeling like that.
i'm going to start heading down a path of self reflection and i'm finally taking the time to get stuff straight with me. now i look back, i'm sure this will change but for now, i've looked back and realized it's not a bad thing all this happened. i'm actually alone, and ok with it. yes, it's hard because i gave away a part of me that i wasn't willing to give ever before but i'm ok with it. i'm tired of feeling jaded from the world, i'm tired of being unhappy with myself. i'm glad this happened maybe now i can finally have time to just do me.

i told my mom last night her thoughts: in return take time for you, don't let this make you feel small because you are big, sam, you have a lot going for you.

i love my mom.